If you have any doubt that Chicago is the messiest, most passive-aggressive city in the world, read on.
Coming to the climax of a season filled with comedic incompetence, the Chicago Bears have collectively managed to jeopardize the future of almost every individual in Halas Hall. Finger pointing aplenty has spread through the organization like a disease, a fatal infirmity. Fortunately, ABC 7’s Mark Giangreco has the cure. #KillYoself.
Um.
So, a day after the Bear’s humiliating loss to the Saints, a game in which QB Jay Cutler threw three interceptions, ABC’s 10 p.m. news team decided to do something a little wily. Sports anchor and veteran reporter Mark Giangreco proposed his idea for a solution to the Bears’ problem. It went like this:
Don’t let the tie fool you. Mark’s got a dark side.
People, of course, got mad. Because: suicides. Also, this isn’t the first time Mark’s crossed the line. Being an habitual line-crosser myself, I truly believe Mark meant no harm. In fact, he feels really bad since the blowback and will be apologizing Wednesday, on-air.
Really though, is any of this Mark’s fault? Consider the following.
Who really watches the evening news anymore?
With most news sources tweeting information in real-time, can we agree that anyone under 60 still watching the evening news must be a real masochist, a real sucker for torture. It’s incredibly depressing. One murder story bleeding into the next (see what I did there?). Really, watching the news before bed is a surefire way to acquire a disorder. Night terrors or something. With this in mind, ratings can’t be great. Mark knows what he’s up against and took one for the team.
Old people are notorious truth tellers.
Listen, Mr. Giangreco ain’t new to this. He’s true to this. This isn’t his first rodeo and a million other clichéd expressions that apply to seasoned vets.
Basically, he’s been doing his job for years and presumably he’s been good at it. He’s 62 years old. He’s seen things. He’s learned some things. Listen to him now or you’ll wish you had later. You know what they say, in prune juice veritas.
Chronic Buyer’s Remorse
Financial folks love to talk ROI, return on investment. Well, Jay’s signed to a ridiculous seven-year, $126.7 million contract. He’s also leading the league in turnovers. It’s no secret that the organization is sick with buyer’s remorse. Fans are ill at the thought of next season. However, keeping a QB like Jay is equivalent to killing any hope the team has at a championship in the near future. It’s playoff suicide.
Situations like this cause people to say some things and do some things.
Puns.
His name alone begs the pun. What was Mark supposed to do? Ignore the obvious? Many fans and insiders wish he was cut, not to mention Cutler is his name. So…kill yourself.
The media loves pushing past boundaries. Inappropriateness is expected in the realm of reality television and pop entertainment. Your evening news apparently wants in on some of that action and they’ve come out #swangin!